So if you didn't check out my post yesterday from Charlotte's blog here it is. If you don't follow her blog you should!
. I have been married for 2 years this May and it has flown by! I can't believe I won't be a newlywed anymore!
1. Communication-
Talk about the big issues. Anytime you are hesitant about something talk about it. This person has already married you, they love you and they want to know how you feel. I constantly tell Andrew, You make me feel ___ when you say __. This can prevent most arguments because most arguments start because one person says something and the other hears something else. We are human, its in our nature to hear things the way we want.
2. Don't talk about each other
This is probably the hardest one. Everyone needs their venting time but this man isn't your boyfriend or some guy you just met. He is your husband. You have to respect him and airing all your dirty laundry to your girlfriends just doesn't cut it at this stage in your relationship. I find that in this situation talking to a family member will help you set your head straight before your talk to your husband.
3. Keep dating
It is so easy to get caught up with the ins and outs of daily life that you know you need some quality one on one time with your husband but its so easy to just go out to eat and call it a date. There are so many other things out there besides going to dinner. You eat dinner every night so spice those dates up. Check out a local winery, the zoo, museums, bowling, putt putt! The options are endless. You can even find some that cost you next to nothing!!
4. Be each others biggest cheerleader
Be each others biggest fan. I tell Andrew how proud of him I am every day because I mean how good does it make you feel when someone says you are doing an awesome job! Whether its for something amazing he has done in his research, becoming another step closer to finishing his PhD, taking another step to grow in his faith, or just doing the dishes. I always say thank you and let him know he is appreciated.
5. Apologize
Apologize, Apologize, Apologize. Everyone argues, no one is perfect. However whether you are right, wrong, or can't settle the argument you still apologize. It's hard to apologize if you believe your not wrong but the key is to understand you may not agree 100% on everything and thats okay. Apologize for arguing because it always results in feeling hurt on both ends and then agree to disagree.
In the end marriage is amazing! I love being with my best friend everyday but with living with another person there are always things to learn. Ask me in two more years and I am sure I can double my list!
What are some tips you have figured out in your marriage?
I think the "don't talk about each other" is crucial. I know girlfriends are there for venting and sometimes you just need to get it off your chest but I think there is a thin line between getting advice and disrespecting your husband. I have one friend who has told me quite a bit about her marriage to the point where sometimes I feel awkward around the couple when they are together!
ReplyDeleteThese are all great tips! We always talk everything out and try not to go to bed mad.
ReplyDeleteI agree - marriage is amazing! I totally agree with the keep dating advice. It keeps the relationship fun and exciting.
ReplyDeleteAnnnnnnd saving this one for when I will inedibly need a reminder when I get to this stage in life ( hopefully sooner than later... fingers CROSSED)
ReplyDeleteLove these tips! Bryce and I are not yet married (or even engaged yet), but a rule we made early in our relationship was not to share our problems with others/talk about each other negatively (i.e. your 2nd tip)! I think it has made all the difference in our relationship! I, personally need to work a little more on your #5 Apologize..I can be so hard headed sometimes!
ReplyDelete